Opportunity Rocks Blog

Dangers of Comparing Yourself to Others

Be honest; you’ve done it. You’ve looked at a friend, colleague, or fellow human and thought, “Why are they doing so much better than me?”

It’s natural… but it’s not healthy. When we compare ourselves to others, we experience:

Stress/anxiety – When you are constantly looking at what others are doing, you may be tempted to do more and more to keep up with them.

Unrealistic Expectations —You can’t be good at everything (and neither can the person you are comparing yourself to). Believing that we should be experts at everything (and probably the first time we do something) will set us up for pain and disappointment.

Lack of Motivation – While you need to accept the fact that you can’t be great at everything, this acceptance may backfire and leave you feeling like you can’t be great at anything. This leads to a lack of motivation and drive.

Resentment – When you compare yourself to others, you may become angry when you don’t “measure up” to these unrealistic expectations. You may start to look at other people as having done something wrong and be resentful that they’ve achieved something you haven’t. This leads to strained relationships and holding onto unnecessary emotions.

Lowered Self-esteem – When you see others as “better” than you, set unrealistic expectations of yourself, and then experience a lack of motivation when you don’t reach them, it begins to erode your self-confidence.

Fortunately, the moment you realize (and admit) you are playing the comparison game, you get to change your behavior and stop.

How to Stop Playing the Comparison Game

When you enter a leadership position, your organization may give you a raise, change your benefit package, and put your name on the wall (or at least the door to your office). What they probably won’t do is ask you what type of leader you are going to be. Many leaders have never gone through any formal business or leadership training. If you find yourself in this camp, it’s okay. This doesn’t mean you can’t be a successful, beloved leader. However, you’ll want to make a few decisions early on that will help shape how you guide and support your team.

If music is so magical, you might wonder if it can be used as a team-building activity. You’ve hired wonderful individuals, yet they haven’t yet gelled as a team for some reason. You want your employees to be happy, working together, supporting one another towards a common goal. How do you foster teamwork and get your employees playing together like a successful band?

Gene Simmons of KISS once said, “James Bond has a license to kill. Rockstars have a license to be outrageous. Rock is about grabbing people’s attention.”
You may not dream of performing in a sold-out arena; however, being a good leader means you’ll need to grab your employees’ band members attention. You’ll need to be someone worthy of looking up to and following. And to do that… you’ll need to be outrageous!
What is an Outrageous Leader?

If you’re a leader, the thought of using the word “love” in a professional context may bring up fears of conversations with Human Resources and potential lawsuits. Don’t worry; we’re not talking about that today. We’re talking about “Agape,” the Greek word for selfless, unconditional love. How do you turn up the volume of the love in your leadership?

Work can be stressful! No matter how much employees are properly trained, love their jobs, and feel a sense of purpose in what they do, situations arise (often daily) that can cause stress and hamper your employees’ satisfaction and happiness. Whether it’s an irate customer, a vendor who delivers late, a coworker who didn’t complete their piece of a project on time, or just tech frustration, stress happens.
Thankfully, there is good news.